Jim’s Immediate Advice Cruise Less - Flirt More Moving from cruising to flirting for many gay men, will be a challenge. Cruising is so embedded in the culture of gay life that the very idea of questioning its value will raise some hackles. I assure you. I am not proposing to kill off cruising as much as to provide an alternative: flirting. Cruising is giving off “I’m ready to fuck” vibrations. Flirting has a little more nuance to it. It is relaxing, casual, and, most of all, charming way of getting a guy’s attention without going all the way. It’s about giving off “I’m ready for romance” vibrations. No sex for the first three dates? No way! The first key to be being a successful gay dater is:  no sex for the first three dates. Cry.Scream. Curse me. But you’ll see it works. Wanting sex is as natural as wanting to eat, but intimacy cannot be rushed. It takes time to know someone, Too much fast food can be harmful to the body, and too much fast sex can be an impediment to intimacy. Romance is fantasy, isn’t it? No!  Romance is about discovering different ways of expressing, giving, and receiving love. It is a glimpse into the divine. Romance means being present to each other without self-consciousness. Romance will soften the most hardened of hearts. It is two adults being “divine” with each other in human form. To read more click here to order Boyfriend 101. To book a coaching session with Jim click here.

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